Thursday, 15 January 2009

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My head is stuffed up with too many emotional thoughts at the moment. I cannot quite get things into perspective. Hopefully a night of sleeping on it will put things back into a better peace. Or maybe I'll have to let go, and accept that some things are lost.
All is okay, don't worry. Just some more of those friendship things I've been feeling of late, come to a bit of head. Have to get over the hump of talking things out and see if we can still be friends. I hope so, but am not sure.

Other things are filling my head, squeezing things out of my eyes and ears. Giving me crazy headaches and hot heads. Ari tells me that I should just tell the headache to, well in his words "shoot itself away". He's quite into shooting things at the moment, only in words. He really doesn't have much idea what he's saying, but it gets reaction from us all!

This is Ari's daily to-do list. "clean house; play; visit grandma; robot machine music; aoolqaom ooimorinim ooaaiom" .
I wish I could take Lori's advice and increase my personal white space . Just not happening at the moment. This week particularly has been so busy with different things. Working more hours than usual (two days for me and two days for Sam), and a new small business course two days a week for me.
We did have a wonderful morning meeting some new friends at a lovely park. So so so good to meet someone and be able to chat and have so much in common, and your children get on well. A sweet little boy, with such lovely manners, who takes in so much around him and talks to us all. Ahhhh, I can see many many fun moments spent with this mama and little one. And also many mama only outings for us grown ups. Sounds fun, hey!

Talking about Mama only outings. I have been getting out a bit more without the kids dragging off me. Apart form working where I finish at 8pm, and then bus home to (hopefully) in bed kids, I went out for dinner with some friends last weekend. Just me and them. Glorious. I can't wait to do it again.

So, a few other things are: I have joined this little swap, on a newly discovered blog. Go and have a look, sure to be fun. Even though I have so much work to be doing over the next 2-3 months, this is something that I want to be part of. It's a kid focused swap - and I know my two little ones will love to receive something for themselves. They are always complaining that they don't get anything. And believe me, the junk mail catalogues aren't good enough for discerning Ari. Though Mishi is quite happy with them.

I am still trying to compose my New Year's thoughts/resolutions. Starting to think it won't quite happen, so not stressing too much. A few little things I'm wanting are to do some more writing. I found this the other day, while I was cleaning up some old papers. Written in my diary while I as on my backpacking trip on my own. So, I'll let you know when I add more writings to my other blog :: lines on a page.
I really like Jade's idea of authenticity. And Anna's word of change. Apart from stop-procrastination, I also would like to try and be more conscious, more in the moment. Not always planning and thinking the next thing. very hard for me, and this year especially when I know that I want to achieve so much professionally with Red Seed Studio, and personally especially working towards a new house.
What are your new year thoughts and resolutions and words??

I have some exciting news, but I'll leave that for a post all of it's own. It's the reason I have so much work ahead of me in the next many months.
Also, I have a giveaway planned, maybe this weekend or next week sometime. So check back.
Good night friends. Take care.

7 comments:

  1. this is my "year of do" -- trying to push partially completed, lingering projects out the door to make room for new thoughts, new ideas. so far, so good!

    white space is a goal i have to continually work toward .. clutter and "too much" seem to be the way things want to go naturally. i have to get out there and sweep away the inessential every morning, like a grocer policing my sidewalk. ;^)

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  2. Finally I felt well enough ( have been sick for ages...) to sit down and surf around blogland. What a joy to visit yours again. So much to read! You are an amazing person do you know that? I can recognize so much from when my kids were young. Never enough time and never, ever time on your own. How I longed for some creative moments and being able to get really absorbed in something...letting go....without someone shouting "mummy where are you". Well that time comes, eventually. Thank god.

    Loved the "white space" - I think that will have to be one of my resolutions. Along with "every day counts" and to go with the flow alot more. I am a very list writing and always planning stuff kind of a gal!

    :-)

    Lots of love to you
    Jeanette

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  3. What a clever way to put it - white space. I'll have to think about that a little. So curious about your news, I'm thinking in one direction only - can be totally wrong, of course. Take care!

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  4. Hi Ellie
    thankyou dearly for the kind words you wrote to me and sharing with how you dealt with your own mum's passing. you mentioned strength and see that in yourself and I feel that too. I do want to talk about my mum but my brother and dad are not ready yet...but in time they will want to i'm sure. mum is in me no doubt about it and i see her strength and sparkly eyes in my baby girls. your message is actually some of the best words i have heard thankyou
    lyndal

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  5. about the friendship . . .

    http://bitsofsunshine.typepad.com/bits_of_sunshine/2009/01/sometimes-i-feel-like-.html

    read that - is that sort of how you feel?

    wishing you peace and a bit of sunshine . . .

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  6. It sounds like you have so much swirling around right now. Sending a prayer for a bit of grace to buoy you up when it becomes too much and help you find some peace and white space along the way.

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  7. thanks Ellie for dropping by the button giveaway and i adore that you mum called you petal plum...and now you use it for your blog...Lyndal

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Thank you for your words and thoughts. I do so appreciate each and every visitor to my blog. While I try hard to reply to your comment, it often doesn't quite happen..... know that I'm sending you a thoughtful thanks xxx

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