Sunday, 31 January 2010

now :: then

Doing this 52 Fridays self portrait challenge has made me really look at myself a bit closer.
My whole self, not just the corner of my eye that I see looking in the rearview mirror while driving the kids to kindy, or doing the shopping. {As I don't generally wear makeup, or style my hair in much of a particular way - I somehow rarely spend much time looking in the mirror. We do not have a full length mirror in our house, so I look at bits here and there, but not the whole overall me - and not with an objective eye.}
I've noticed that I frown a lot. Sam tells me so, too. But until you see if yourself - and look - you don't really know or take notice. My mum used to frown a lot, too.
Not in a frowning way, just - that's the face I make. The face I own.
I wonder, though, our faces are an expression of our life. The deep lines etched into our faces are part of what our days take us through. Someone who scowls or smokes their whole life will have lots of little lines around their mouth, someone who frowns will have furrows in their brow. Someone who laughs easily, happily at life will have soft lines at their eyes.
I do not seem to have soft lines at my eyes.
I seem to have furrows and frowns on my brow.

but, oh, but look at these photos from just over a year ago. I look more than a year younger. I look at ease, happy, carefree.

So - I've been wondering, thinking, pondering. Does this mean that the last year of my life has been filled with stresses, furrows, frowns. And why.
When was the last time I was that happy?
Or have I spent too much time trying to get to somewhere (a new, dream house; a new, successful working life; my won business; my own sense of self; time without my children.....).

So - I'm challenging myself, through the 52 Friday's challenge, to find a happier, carefree, more laughing me.


  1. You have a great smile :)

  2. These photos are beautiful and you do glow happiness there,Great reflections, I am sure you will find your happiness!I am on a similar path this year and hopefully we will both celebrate with some great smiles soon:)!

  3. you are so pretty, Ellie!
    smile more on the outside and your heart will smile, too. :)

  4. Thanks for sharing. Might inspire me to do the same after our move?!

  5. What a great project - 52 Friday self portraits... I can certainly relate to the furrows and frowns in my brow, I can't see it yours though! I might try something like this...and see if my self image changes for better or worse?
    We are definitely our own harshest critics though, aren't we. Particularly as we get older our face in the mirror can hard to appreciate or even recognize! I can cope with my grey hairs, I feel I earnt them...but the furrows - damb and blast them!
    Michele x
    P.S. Enjoying your blog very much!


Thank you for your words and thoughts. I do so appreciate each and every visitor to my blog. While I try hard to reply to your comment, it often doesn't quite happen..... know that I'm sending you a thoughtful thanks xxx

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...